Kids Parents Club

The parents of three-year-old Pipi Quinlan got a nasty shock when they found she had bought a $20,000 earth-moving digger on auction website TradeMe, tvnz.co.nz reports.

Pipi, who decided to play on the computer while the rest of her family were asleep, entered the Trade Me site that her mother was already logged on to, The Rodney Times reported.

With a few clicks of the mouse, she won the most recent auction listed on the site’s homepage – a Kobelco digger for $20,000.

“The first I knew about it was when I came down and opened up the computer,” Pipi’s mother Sarah told the newspaper.

The boss of a top art gallery Mark Jamieson got the shock of his life when he found out his new “star” Aelita Andre was a two-year-old. “I was shocked and a little embarrassed” he said.

Tiny genius?
Aelita’s mother Nikka Kalashnikova and her husband, Michael Andre, did not set out to mislead the gallery. They simply wanted Aelita’s work to be judged on its merits. “Of course, every mother is proud of their child. I didn’t tell him (Jamieson) because I had all these feelings going through my head — fear, embarrassment.”

Kalashnikova says Aelita began painting shortly before she could walk. Both parents are artists and Aelita was used to seeing them work on canvases on the floor.

Kalashnikova at first dismissed Aelita’s painting as “just mucking around” but by August last year she’d seen enough potential that she provided her with a canvas painted red (by her mother) and let her get to work. The image that resulted is among those on display in the exhibition, which has been opened on January 16 in Melburn.

Once there were three little pigs who lived together in mutual respect and in harmony with their environment. Using materials that were indigenous to the area, they each built a beautiful house. One pig built a house of straw, one a house of sticks, and one a house of dung, clay, and creeper vines shaped into bricks and baked in a small kiln. When they were finished, the pigs were satisfied with their work and settled back to live in peace and self-determination.

But their idyll was soon shattered. One day, along came a big, bad wolf with expansionist ideas. He saw the pigs and grew very hungry, in both the physical and ideological sense. When the pigs saw the wolf, they ran into the house of straw. The wolf ran up to the house and banged on the door, shouting, “Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!”

The pigs shouted back, “Your gunboat tactics hold no fear for pigs defending their homes and culture.”

But the wolf wasn’t to be denied what he thought was his manifest destiny. So he huffed and he puffed and he blew down the house of straw. The frightened pigs ran to the house of sticks, with the wolf in hot pursuit. Where the house of straw had stood, other wolves bought up the land and
started a banana plantation. At the house of sticks, the wolf again banged on the door and shouted,

“Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!”

The pigs shouted, “Go to hell, you carnivorous, imperialistic oppressor!”

At this, the wolf chuckled condescendingly. He thought to himself:
“They are so childlike in their ways. It will be a shame to see them go, but progress cannot be stopped.”

So the wolf huffed and puffed and blew down the house of sticks. The pigs ran to the house of bricks, with the wolf close at their heels. Where the house of sticks had stood, other wolves built a time-share condo resort complex for vacationing wolves, with each unit a fiberglass reconstruction of the house of sticks, as well as native curio shops, snorkeling, and dolphin shows.

At the house of bricks, the wolf again banged on the door and shouted, “Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!”

This time in resp?nse, the pigs sang songs of solidarity and wrote letters of protest to the United Nations.

By now the wolf was getting angry at the pigs’ refusal to see the situation from the carnivore’s point of view. So he huffed and he puffed, and huffed and puffed, the grabbed his chest and fell over dead of a massive heart attack brought on from eating too many fatty foods.

The three little pigs rejoiced that justice had triumphed and did a little dance around the corpse of the wolf. Their next step was to liberate their homeland. They gathered together a band of other pigs who had been forced off their lands. Their new brigade of porcinistas attacked the resort complex with machine guns and rocket launchers and slaughtered the cruel wolf oppressors, sending a clear signal to the rest of the hemisphere not to meddle in their internal affairs. Then the pigs set up a model socialist democracy with free education, universal health care, and affordable housing for everyone.

Please Note: The wolf in this story was a metaphorical construct. No actual wolves were harmed in the writing of the story.

excerpt from J.F.Garner’s book “Politically Correct Bedtime Stories.”

“I’ve been a head teacher 16 years and a teacher longer than that and I’ve never known anything like this”, Christine Jones, the head teacher of Bassetts Farm School said.

“There are sometimes more boys than girls in a class – and vice versa – but never all the same sex – it’s pretty incredible.

“It first became clear something unusual was happening when we got the list of names from the local authority – and there wasn’t a girl on it.

“Nobody can work out how it happened – it just seems to be a one of those freakish things.” It sounds funny but ‘ve thought that all nice boys look like born from the same egg!-) However that’s great deal to become egg donor to help all those couples who cannot have genetic children because may not have eggs that can be successfully fertilized. That’s like a chance to work wonders – new life!

One parent added: “Maybe it’s something in the local water.”
Daily Mail reported.

One day, walking the Sunday’s streets we’ve been watched this jolly crowd. At the moment Bennie was not with us. Oh, I believe that If he were here he would go along with this sweet company with a big pleasure.